Fruit Snacks, Pool, Giggle Weed and Pizza

Now that George Michael is a quarter of a way through his time in the slammer (time flies, eh?), thoughts in a quiet, leafy road in Highgate, North London, are turning to his release. In particular, the big question on people’s minds is how to properly welcome him back home.  Some key parts of “Operation wb” are already formulated, but with only three weeks to go, it’s going to be a race to get everything ready in time.

Those familiar with George’s and Kenny’s love of art (well, OK, George only pretends to like the art) will not be surprised to learn that Kenny has commissioned the young British artist, Tracey Emin (47), to produce a new work entitled, “Fruit Snacks and Pool” to celebrate George’s release.  Kenny said,

“I’m mostly leaving it up to Tracey to interpret the title however she wants. The only directions I’ve given her are that it should be reassuringly expensive, and that the work needs to include apples, because those are George’s favorite fruit snack in jail. He used to like oranges more, but he told me on the phone last night that, in his opinion, you really can’t compare apples to oranges.”

The new work will be the centerpiece of the “Welcome Home George” art display that Kenny and pal, David Austin, are planning to put in the entrance hall of the £8M Highgate home (thats £8M, Daily Mail, not £5M) that George and Kenny share. David Austin has been in secret talks with “The Guv’nor” of Highpoint Prison to try to let him buy the pool table that George has grown to love in the last few days. David said,

“George really loves his routine – and now that George has taken up pool as a new hobby, we think it would be nice for George to be able to play pool on the table he’s used to playing on in prison. I’ve been talking to The Guv’nor at the prison, and he says if we bung him a few quid, and get him some good lick, he’ll see what he can do. He seems like a really good guy actually – apparently, he and George enjoy partaking of the giggle weed together most nights – and then George sends him out to get pizza.”

However, it seems not everyone agrees with the plans. One fellow North London resident, Tony Parsons, is up in arms about the plans. Tony explained,

“The George Michael I knew would be disgusted with these plans. The fresh-faced boy I remember would never have played pool, or eaten fruit snacks. And he would have been sickened by the antics of Kenny and David.  But he’s stubborn.  He’ll go along with these plans, just to spite me.  I really hope that he comes to his senses soon, for his own sake.”

Phew, that’s a big update! But wait! As George’s favourite comedian, Jimmy Cricket, likes to say – there’s more… A visitor at Highpoint Prison has been talking to The Sun and The Mirror,

“How much do I get paid to give you guys some exclusive quotes about George’s time inside?  You want me to say that he’s doing well? Or that he’s having a hard time? That ‘s he’s looking old or young? That’s he’s really good or bad at pool? Or something to provoke your unwashed readers to bang on about prison being like a hotel?  Better yet – just give me the cash, and make up your own quotes. Cheers.”

Well, there you have it. That’s about all for now, I think.  In case it’s not obvious, all the above is about as accurate as the nonsense you’ve been reading in the papers…

18 thoughts on “Fruit Snacks, Pool, Giggle Weed and Pizza

  1. George – Honey,

    My warmest thoughts are with you all the time.
    It is difficult to find the words which could comfort you in your current situation, I know.
    But remember – you are not alone, even if you may feel that way at the moment.
    There are many people who love you for who you trully are, and they support you through your good and your bad times. And all the rubbish that haters say or write, is not going to take this love and support away from you.
    I just would like you to remember this and to stay strong.

    I pray that you will be back home sooner, and that you will have the strength it takes, to put this bad chapter of your life behind you, once and for good.

    I worry about you so much George, but I always have so much faith in you! And you have to have faith in youfself! You are too good to give up the fight for your happiness!

    Never be afraid to ask for help…

    With lots of warmth,
    A xxx

  2. Wasn’t it Ani who attacked me viciously back in March when I came here to post after many months? Yes, it was. So again, just like Amazone and so many others, how is it possible for such women to really love George when they have so venom for another soul?

    They won’t be able to answer that because they know the answer is that yes, their problem with me here is that they can’t handle the fact that I have the kind of spiritual/psychic connection with George that I do. And so they try to bully me into silence.

    The other problem they have is more general. I mean, even if it wasn’t me and it was some other woman, they would still get jealous and nasty. And not only because of George. Just anything they thought they wanted and couldn’t get.

    So they talk about the “haters” just like George does but the REAL haters is them!

    I ‘m pretty sure some here got very annoyed by what I said about marrying him in another life… I so knew it… lol

  3. @Faylinn: Do not turn the truth in your way you like it…Jesus knows everything. And you will feel bad and just need another nick.

  4. Yes. It’s a shame they felt they had to speed the track up to make it more danceable, ‘cos the vocals now sound a bit “chipmunk”ed. Otherwise, it’s OK. Not very imaginative, I don’t think; but not offensive.

    I think most George fans will like it, but I’ll be surprised if it catches the imagination of the general public.

  5. Can’t they let George out today !!! ??? I think it is too much now , it is time to let the good man out from the dreadful place , please !!!

  6. I was looking for something interesting about George Michael on the web and found this blog instead. So fun to read! keep it going!

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