Press Release: Buzzin’ Paintin’ & Decoratin’

Press Release:

Buzzin’ Enterprises Announces
Buzzin’ Paintin’ & Decoratin’

Buzzin’ Enterprises (UK) today announces a brand new service that offers exclusive painting and decorating services for clients throughout the US and Europe.  Aimed at the discerning customer, Buzzin’ Paintin’ & Decoratin’ will paint individual interior walls of client’s homes, either in their presence, or while they’re out in the garden.    The charge per wall will be £2M (GBP) or $4M (USD).

Buzzin’ Enterprises is delighted to announce that we’ve already signed up our first client for this new service – superstar, George Michael.   Yesterday, the company completed the painting of one wall in Mr Michael’s home in Highgate, North London, and the company may paint others in the near future.   George Michael commented,

“I am delighted with the quality of the work that Buzzin’ Paintin’ & Decortin’ carried out in my home.  I watched the whole time they were painting, and they didn’t spill a single drop of paint on the floor, or go over any edges of the original plaster coving.   As far as I’m concerned, they offer a fantastic service at a reasonable price. I love that they let me stay in the house while they’e painting.  Other painters I know make you go outside in the sunshine.”

Buzzin’ boss, Remarkable added,

“It was a genuine pleasure to have George – yes, he made us call him George, and not ‘Mr Michael’ – as our first client for this new service. George’s favourite colour for walls is off-white, and he now has a lovely off-white wall in his main living room, exactly as he’d always wanted. As soon as he completes his US tour this summer, he has told us that he will be able to afford to have another wall painted.”

To celebrate the completion of the company’s first wall, Buzzin’ Enterprises has presented George Michael and Kenny Goss with a really huge canvas painted the exact same color as the wall.  The company titled the canvas, ‘Very Slightly Dirty Polar Bear In A Very Slightly Dirty Snow Storm’. Mr Goss, who is an avid art collector, said the piece take pride of place in the pair’s art gallery in Dallas, Texas.  Mr Goss commented,

“This work will fit perfectly in the gallery.  I’m gonna use it to cover up an unsightly dead cow that some bastard left there one night.  It won’t get rid of the smell, but at least we won’t have to look at the bloody thing anymore.”

Buzzin’ Enterprises expects to be overwhelmed with enquiries about this new sub-ten-million-per-room painting service, which taps a huge unmet need.

ENDS

Please note that this press release contains forward looking statements.   Events outside the control of Buzzin’ Enterprises might cause actual results to vary from those presented here.

10 thoughts on “Press Release: Buzzin’ Paintin’ & Decoratin’

  1. I’m a h u g e fan of the total-body-painting (preferably gold). Do you provide that too, for an additional fee? I have a couple of names in mind

  2. Actually, I think Banksy’s work is very cool. Wouldn’t mind him painting some of my walls one day. But alas, I probably couldn’t afford him.

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